HAHBAT and IDAHOT – not just a string of letters

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HAHBAT and IDAHOT – not just a string of letters

May 17, 2015 by Elin Gregory

It’s May 17th again – don’t the years roll by quickly? – and time for another:

Hop Against Homophobia, Biphobia and Transphobia.

This isn’t to say that this is something we should be bearing in mind just once a year. I would hope that anyone who reads this is already well aware of the message but a bit of reinforcement never hurts.

One of my favourite quotes is from Plato. In the original text there’s a lot more to it but the sentiment remains one of the best rules of thumb that I know, and it is usually rendered as:

Be kind – for everyone you meet is fighting a battle about which you know nothing.

It doesn’t usually cost anything to be kind but it can take some effort.

I had an email this week, one of those annoying All Staff emails that usually refer to pilates classes in the lunch hour at a venue 30 miles away, or surplus office equipment. Normally I delete them but this one caught my eye because it had this heading:

It had been sent by Stonewall Cymru, Yr elusen cydraddoldeb lesbiaidd, hoyw, deurywiol a thraws yng Nghymru [The all-Wales charity for lesbian, gay, bisexual & trans equality], as a little reminder that all public places and the public servants who work in them should be mindful, careful and thoughtful at all times and not just when they think they should. Battles are being fought every day, quiet, painful secret struggles, by brave warriors whose polite smiles conceal the wounds they carry.

At the very least we should not be adding to the burdens carried so secretly but Stonewall Cymru takes it a step further with their watchword DimAnwybyddu = No Bystanders. If you hear the comment, that nasty sneering throwaway cut, challenge it. If you see something you suspect might be bullying, interfere. Even the old and the slow, like me, can bear witness, and make it clear that we are prepared to do so.

As usual I’ll be donating, as usual to AKT, and as usual I’m offering a prize to a commenter – an ecopy of A Taste of Copper. Don’t forget to leave your contact deets in your comment.

Posted in Causes, contest | 29 Comments

29 Responses

on May 17, 2015 at 10:36 am | Reply Hop Against Homophobia, Bi-and Transphobia, May 17 – 24 | Anna Butler

[…] Elin Gregory […]
on May 17, 2015 at 10:55 am | Reply debby236

I shall support the cause for my daughter.
debby236 at gmail dot com
- on May 17, 2015 at 11:43 am | Reply Elin Gregory
  
  Thanks Debby.
on May 17, 2015 at 10:58 am | Reply annabutlerfiction

Great post, Elin, and the video hits the spot. Hard.
- on May 17, 2015 at 11:44 am | Reply Elin Gregory
  
  Very uncomfortable hearing those words spoken with such anger.
  
  xx
on May 17, 2015 at 12:31 pm | Reply helenajust

No Bystanders — a good rule to live by.
on May 17, 2015 at 12:32 pm | Reply It’s Not Work if You Love What You Do | Kimber Vale

[…] Elin Gregory […]
on May 17, 2015 at 3:58 pm | Reply #HAHABT – I think we’re doing something right. | Lori Toland

[…] Elin Gregory […]
on May 17, 2015 at 4:17 pm | Reply Andrew J. Peters

#YesNoBystanders! Great post Elin. 🙂
on May 17, 2015 at 4:33 pm | Reply Anastasia Vitsky

This is a new cause to me. Thank you for pointing it out! It is nice to see the strides we are making.
on May 17, 2015 at 5:46 pm | Reply Love the #rainbow with the #HAHABT blog hop – enter here, stay tolerant for good! | Eva Lefoy

[…] Elin Gregory […]
on May 17, 2015 at 6:25 pm | Reply Sarah_Madison

Awesome post–love the concept of ‘no bystanders’ too. Very cool. It’s something we’re working on with the kids around here. They don’t seem to think there’s anything wrong with what they are saying simply cause all their friends say it. I ask them to substitute different words (like was done in this video here) and see how the feel about it then. Hopefully, we’re making a dent.
on May 17, 2015 at 6:46 pm | Reply felinewyvern

Don’t bother adding me for the prize (I already have a Taste Of Copper) but I wanted to comment and say that I enjoyed your post.

I too believe in the ‘don’t stand by and do nothing’ creed even if it has got me in trouble a time or two. However now that I use a walking stick I seem to be more intimidating to the bullies so can interfere more easily 😀
on May 17, 2015 at 7:52 pm | Reply Andrew Ashling

I agree. I also agree with Martin Luther King Jr.: “In the end, we will remember not the words of our enemies, but the silence of our friends.”
on May 17, 2015 at 9:26 pm | Reply suze294

Thanks Elin, have booked marked the Nobystanders to look at later when I have lots of time. Good message though.

Littlesuze at hotmail.com
on May 17, 2015 at 11:47 pm | Reply Cornelia

Thanks for the informative post and hop.
on May 18, 2015 at 2:33 am | Reply Ree Dee

Thank you for that video. The NO Bystanders should become a motto for all!
on May 18, 2015 at 3:42 am | Reply HAHABT

[…] Elin Gregory […]
on May 18, 2015 at 12:48 pm | Reply juliesmall1959

Very informative post. I have not seen this video before. Thank you for sharing.

juliesmall2016(at)gmail(dot)com
on May 18, 2015 at 7:03 pm | Reply Hop Against Homophobia, Bi- and Transphobia 2015 - Jolynn Raymond's Dark Obsessions

[…] Elin Gregory […]
on May 18, 2015 at 7:50 pm | Reply JP Kenwood

Reblogged this on JP Kenwood and commented:
Great post, super important message.
on May 19, 2015 at 4:15 am | Reply Hop Against Homophobia and Transphobia 2015 | DS Kenn

[…] Elin Gregory […]
on May 19, 2015 at 4:29 am | Reply Trix

Very touching and thought-provoking!

vitajex(at)aol(Dot)com
on May 19, 2015 at 4:59 am | Reply H.B.

Great post! I especially love the quote and whole heartily agree with it. Thank you for the post and for helping to spread awareness.

humhumbum AT yahoo DOT com
on May 23, 2015 at 7:35 am | Reply Lee Todd

#NoBystanders ❤

leetee2007(at)hotmail(dot)com
on May 24, 2015 at 3:01 am | Reply bn100

Thanks for joining; nice post

bn100candg at hotmail dot com
on May 24, 2015 at 4:43 pm | Reply sherry1969

Thanks for the post and the video.
sstrode at scrtc dot com
on May 24, 2015 at 8:38 pm | Reply sula22

That was quite a powerful video, partly as it shows that prejudice and bullying happens regardless of race, culture or gender. It was quite painful for me, as as I was bullied as a child and have found that most bullies just grow up to be bullies as adults unless we speak out and join together against it. thank you for bringing this to our attention and for being part of this blog hop 😀 slholland22 {at} hotmail {dot} com

If you go to the main Stonewall site there are quite a lot of LGBT resources and advice available. (http://www.stonewall.org.uk/)
on June 3, 2015 at 2:34 am | Reply Hop Against Homophobia, Bi, and Transphobia | Michael Mandrake

[…] Elin Gregory […]