Hump Day Hook #5

February 27, 2013 by Elin Gregory

Another Wednesday and another hook

Hump Day Hook is a weekly event where a bunch of authors post excerpts of their own work then whizz around from blog to blog reading and being nice about other people’s 🙂

I’m posting bits of a very old story that’s a little bit Georgette Heyer and a little bit Barbara Cartland and a teensy bit Mad Magazine.

This is the beginning of chapter 2, and a change of POV. In fact more than one. At that point in my writing experience I’d never heard of POV or that it was preferable to stick to just one at a time so please excuse the 3rd person omni.

~~~

The April sun was bright, but a chill wind with a hint of showers prompted Lady Cicely Stanton-Rivers to walk more briskly along the pavement and up the steps to her front door. As she set her neatly shod foot upon the top step, the door swung open and she swept through the porch and into the hall, her maid bustling at her heels.
“Did you enjoy your walk, my lady?” asked the butler, a tray piled high with envelopes in his hands.
“Well enough, Tench,” Lady Cicely replied. “The weather is uncommonly fine for the season. Are all those for me?”
“Yes, my lady. Shall I have some tea carried up to the morning room?”
Cicely thanked him and began to sort through the envelopes and packets as she climbed the sweeping marble staircase. As she glanced at the last of them she gave a little sigh, then passed out of sight.
“If a lady as fine and kind as our Lady Cicely was hanging on my every word,” the younger of the two footmen commented to his fellow, “you’d not catch me running off with some fat draper’s widow, no matter how well-heeled she was.”
Tench turned upon him, brows raised loftily. “Thank you for that information, young Horace,” he said. “I’ll be sure to pass it on.” Then he departed for his domain below stairs leaving Horace in no way discomfited, for he had long since learned that Tench’s bark was far worse than his bite.

~~~

This is, of course, a transparent ploy to put off telling you what Aubrey got up to. *smug face*

Posted in Uncategorized | 23 Comments

23 Responses

on February 27, 2013 at 10:42 am | Reply shehannemoore

OOh! Young Horace. Love it despite the POVs!!
- on February 27, 2013 at 11:06 pm | Reply Elin Gregory
  
  Oh I had NO inhibitions in those days, POVwise. Writing was more fun too 🙂 Thanks for commenting
on February 27, 2013 at 11:24 am | Reply jessielansdel

Ha ha. Why do I think the name Horace is sooooo funny. I can visualise Margaret Lockwood and Phyllis Calvert in this one. Wonderful. 😀
- on February 27, 2013 at 11:08 pm | Reply Elin Gregory
  
  Ooh yes they’d take the parts. LOL
on February 27, 2013 at 12:56 pm | Reply naomi

This is excellently written. Love young Horace. Great hook
- on February 27, 2013 at 11:08 pm | Reply Elin Gregory
  
  Thanks for commenting Naomi.
on February 27, 2013 at 3:23 pm | Reply Gem

You have captured the propriety of the classes at the same time revealing the emotion beneath. Well done!
- on February 27, 2013 at 11:12 pm | Reply Elin Gregory
  
  Thank Gem, and thanks for commenting. 🙂
on February 27, 2013 at 3:25 pm | Reply Jessica Subject

Oh, and he told Tench. Nice hook! 🙂
- on March 1, 2013 at 12:49 pm | Reply Elin Gregory
  
  Thanks Jessica. I don’t like historicals where the servants are just furniture. they must have had some tales to tell!
on February 27, 2013 at 4:17 pm | Reply Alexandra Anthony

Great hook. I was sorry it was over!
on February 27, 2013 at 6:29 pm | Reply Lucy Felthouse

Fab hook, and I love that image!
on February 27, 2013 at 6:46 pm | Reply Flossie Benton Rogers

Great period feel to it. Well done.
on February 27, 2013 at 7:53 pm | Reply Sandra Sookoo

Nicely done 🙂
on February 27, 2013 at 8:24 pm | Reply Sherry Gloag

Love the tone of this scene. Great ending.
on February 27, 2013 at 9:06 pm | Reply Sue

I love the details in this
then passed out of sight I assume is the omni Ah POV one of the hardest things to learn. I just recently learned about head hopping
on February 27, 2013 at 9:43 pm | Reply JadeCrystal

Ah, you sneaky…I wanted to read more about Aubrey, lol. But I enjoyed this a lot as well. The banter, for lack of a better word, between Tench and Horace brought a smile to my face. I love period pieces. Great hook!
on February 27, 2013 at 11:02 pm | Reply Mandy Earles (@meryvamp)

Oh this is great. I can really feel the time period here. It reminds me of Downtown Abbey. Ever seen it? Horace reminds me of Thomas. I love to hate him 🙂
on February 27, 2013 at 11:19 pm | Reply Ciaran Dwynvil

🙂 I second Jade. Bring Aubrey back 🙂

But I did enjoy the banter too. A refreshing touch of humor.
on February 28, 2013 at 4:28 am | Reply diannehartsock

Horace sounds like a rascal! I love above/below stairs stories. 🙂
on February 28, 2013 at 12:20 pm | Reply Taryn Kincaid

Love that Tench!
on February 28, 2013 at 2:56 pm | Reply Christina Cole

I enjoyed this hook. Would love to know more about these characters.
on March 1, 2013 at 7:54 am | Reply Kathleen grieve

You have the voice and mannerisms Down pat for historical writing. I wondered what all those envelopes contained…balls?